Most People Go Their Entire Lives Without Being Locked Inside a National Park

On January 29, 2010, Jeff and I did a hike to Little Greenbrier School and the Walker Sisters Home.  The trailhead is at Metcalf Bottoms picnic area in the Great Smoky Mountains National Park. While we were on the trail it started snowing.  It was awesome being on trail when the snow started and we were quite content.  The school and the homesite were both fun places to visit and I took several photographs of those locations, as well as snowy footbridges and rhododendrun. The hike had begun with brown winter surroundings and was ending with snow-covered hillsides, valleys, and vegetation.

Jeff in the snow.

By the time we got done with the hike there was a layer of snow on the jeep and icicles had formed on the back hatch.  The nearby bridge hadn't even been driven across so I took a photo of it with the fresh snow.  Then I did a slow-shutter water shot near the road.  It was at this point that a passerby stopped his SUV and told me the gate at the end of the shortcut road to Wears Valley was down and locked.  I thanked him for the info and loaded up.  We needed to go to Wears Valley to our cabin so we just headed toward Townsend.  While we were going that way we met the same guy coming from the direction of Townsend.  He had stopped in the road to tell us the gate into the Townsend Road was locked, too.  They did not have a cell signal and neither did we so the two vehicles headed off toward the Gatlinburg entrance of the park.

It was strange and eerie to be the only two cars driving Smoky Mountain roadways.  It was also fun and exciting!  Jeff mentioned that the other car was driving really fast and that he should slow down before he hit an icy spot.   The snow had turned to sleet after we learned the Townsend gate was closed, and there were some slick spots on Little River Road.  We lost sight of the other car, while Jeff drove very conservatively in his 4-wheel drive Jeep Patriot with off-road tires.  Even with the 4WD and off-road tires, we did feel a few slippery spots.  The guy in front of us was driving a SUV crossover with road tires.  I'll call him "Crossover Guy" henceforward.

A few miles later, we noticed that Crossover Guy's tire tracks indicated he left the road momentarily.  Fortunately he recovered nicely and we did not have to administer CPR to CG or MCG (Mrs. Crossover Guy.)

A brief break in cell signal purgatory opened up and I called the official GSMNP number, only to hear an endless series of pre-recorded messages with no option to talk to a real person.

A call to 411 got us the phone number for the Sevier County Sheriff's Department.  The dispatch officer assured me that the gate at Sugarlands was open to people wanting to leave the park via Gatlinburg.  We were relieved.

Then, we caught up with Crossover Guy only to see him pull over.  Rolling windows down, we discovered they were wanting us to lead so they could drive in our tracks.  Apparently Mrs. Crossover Guy had chewed out her husband about his rate of speed because after we took the lead, Crossover Guy religiously maintained an earth-scorching pace of 10 mph.  Not wanting to leave them stranded, we also slowed down to about 15 mph and stopped periodically to wait.  Jeff would have been happy to go 30 mph (except on the curves), as it felt safe with our setup.

So, we finally got to the gate (that we had been assured was open) only to find it locked.  Thankfully, we did have a cell phone signal at this point and Jeff called 911, who, in turn, put us through to a real-life talking ranger.

Fifteen minutes later a ranger driving a snow plow pulled up to open the gate for us.  We thanked him and drove off at about 30 mpg, leaving Mr. and Mrs. Crossover Guy to be a distant memory.  The Good Lord knows I crave adventure so He obliges from time to time.

Above:  Mr. Ranger comes to open the gate.

Inspirational Acronym of the Day

C.L.I.M.B.

Cussing like I mean business.  Sorry, that's the best I can do.   ;)

It Finally Happened.........

According to a very important email I received today, beautiful Russian women are waiting to meet me!

Lost in Bankhead

Finding waterfalls in the Bankhead/Sipsey area often means bushwhacking.  Many of the waterfalls are not on the trails.  Here are some commonly used Jeff and Janice bushwhacking phrases:

• "Is that tire a good sign?"

• "How far could it be?"

• "When we get to the falls the way we were supposed to go, we’ll see a wedding party there. The Snack Bar might even be open."

And my favorite:

• "Grabbing the dead tree for support, she fell to her death at the tender age of 45."

Porta-Potties in the Bokeh

A year ago, neither Jeff nor I knew what "bokeh" was.  Now it's become common household language.  Jeff and I were watching a scary movie we rented.  The movie was about a pandemic that changed the USA forever.  A little girl had the virus and told her dad she needed to go to the bathroom.  The focus was on the girl and her dad but in the blurry background of the frame we saw a row of blue porta-potties.  I thought it was so funny when my non-photographer husband said, "There are porta-potties in the bokeh!"  ;)

Adventure at Salt Creek Falls

Salt Creek Falls B/W
Originally uploaded by Janice Wagnon

When Jeff woke me up at 5:30 on a Saturday morning to go to this waterfall, my first thought was that I would not get up until my list of demands had been met.  The bed was warm and toasty and the forecast called for 9 degrees outside.  My first demand (a.k.a. stalling technique) was for a warm cat to purr on me.  Upon hearing said demand, Jeff let the cats in the bedroom with instructions to "get Mama out of bed."  Chalupa jumped up on me and purred warmly on my belly.

Now, I needed to add to my list of demands in order to stay in bed longer.  So, I told Jeff I would not get up until I was served hot Australian tea in bed.  Jeff played along and added that it must be served by a british butler with a lisp who was born on the fourth of July in 1954.

Seeing my negotiations were getting nowhere, I crawled out of bed muttering profanities under my breath.  Fast forward one hour and we're climbing out of the jeep wondering which trail leads down the cliff to the base of Salt Creek Falls.  We found the trail to the top of the falls first.  Then found a trail off to the right that seemed to be the correct one.

It should be noted at this point that the word "trail" is an optimistic way to describe a challenging path of boulders and snow-covered ledges.  Some thoughtful souls had reserved themselves a place in Heaven by securing a series of ropes and one fire hose to trees bordering the path.  Without these ropes I certainly would not have made it down to the base of the falls, let alone back up!

I had been warned by a very sweet lady trained in search and rescue that this was a treacherous trip and that I should proceed at all times with caution.  Her last words of advice to me were not to attempt this feat alone.

Finally down at the base of the waterfall we were not a little impressed by the size of the waterfall and the amount of flow.  In addition to the voluminous flowing water, we saw icicles dotting the cliffs and even the waterfall itself.  In the pool beneath the waterfall, large chunks of ice clung to the shore.

When we had left the jeep it was 14 degrees F., NOT accounting for wind chill.  Here at the base of the icy falls it felt like about 10 below zero!  I set up my tripod and took three long exposure shots before my fingers froze into a paralytic numbness.  I decided not to take any more photos and save what was left of my hands for the climb back up.

The trip up the path/icy boulders was scary!  I used the ropes to help as much as I could, but using ropes requires a certain amount of upper body strength, which I am sorely lacking.  At one especially treacherous point, I actually had to sit down and gather up courage before attempting the scale.  I even backed out a few times and just sat wondering if I would die there.  Jeff climbed on up ahead of me to see if he could get in a position to help pull me up.  Finally, I envisioned a way to side step the climb up two huge rocks.  Whew!  I've never been so proud as I was when I reached the top!  When I climbed back breathless into the jeep I felt like I had just invented some life-saving serum or scaled Mt. Everest!  It was a great sense of accomplishment.  :)  Thank you to Bill Wilson from Flickr and Terri from Get Lost! for helping us with directions and advice!  :)

Mize Mill Falls, Sipsey Wilderness

Mize Mill Fall- side ~explored :)
Originally uploaded by Janice Wagnon

One awesome spot.
A little Heaven on Earth.

Life in the Janice Lane

I once thought life was nothing more than a temporary inconvenience. Just one way to pass time until I get to Heaven. I'm starting to feel a little bit more optimistic now. Stay tuned....